Calling All Gamers!

Hey, gamers! If you scroll to the very bottom, you will see something titled "Some other blogs worth checking out". There, you can find some links to a couple of my friends' blogs. The highlight of the blogs are video games, so if you are a gamer, you should definitely check those blogs out!

My Problem

I have this problem where I blame things on other people... It's my parents' fault! I got it from them! Durn genetics!

How to be Unbored in the Car: Eight Tips

I think we've all had a few times in our life when we're on a long car trip, and all the landscape looks the same. There's nothing to look at, nothing to laugh at, and nothing to DO. Let's face it: The being-in-the-car parts of vacations can be really BORING. Well, this post is to help cure boredom! 

Tip #1: Play a blinking game

Looking out the window can get repetitive... but you can turn repetitiveness into a game! Here's the basic idea of how it works: Let's say you're on a highway. On many highways, there are poles that have mile markers, or signs along the way. You can only blink when you are in between a set of poles, or when your car is not driving by a sign. There are different variations of this game; one I created is when you can only blink when you're driving by another car. You can make up the rules; this is now your game! (And now a message from Captain Obvious: WARNING. THIS GAME IS NOT TO BE PLAYED IF YOU ARE THE DRIVER.) 

Tip #2: Bring all necessary items that bring you joy

Don't be the person that packs everything except one crucial item. After you've packed your bags, double check, then triple check that you have everything. Handheld electronics can be really fun in the car, but make sure you bring headphones, so you don't distract the driver(which had better not be you if you are using these tips!) or disturb other passengers in the car. Also make sure to have car chargers for all electronics you bring. It would be a shame if all you had to play on was a Nintendo 3DS XL, for example, and it died! I would also suggest bring a cellular phone, or CELL phone, as everyone says, that you can watch videos on. You may be able to look up your favorite television show, or TV, as everyone says, and watch it for the whole trip if you do so please! My favorite television show is Saturday Night Live. (Please note that if you are under the age of fourteen, please get parental consent before watching.)https://screen.yahoo.com/bein-quirky-zooey-deschanel-1-000000851.html?query=snl%20zooey is one clip that I would suggest watching. Be sure not to only bring electronics, too. After all, this tip IS called, "Bring ALL necessary items that bring you joy". You should bring books, too. Bring LOTS of books if you are a quick and avid reader(and don't get carsick).

Tip #3: Leave some items in the car

If you know that you sometimes forget something that you want to bring, just leave it in the car. That way, you won't forget about it. One item that I suggest leaving in the car are car chargers for your electronics. I mean, where else would you use car chargers? In your house? In the middle of the sidewalk? In a corn field???

Tip #4: Paper

Paper is an item that many people take for granted, but there's so much you can do with it! You can fold it in over a million ways, you can draw infinite things on it, you can write a story(eth) on it, you can keep track of a made-up language, you can eat it(although I wouldn't recommend it, so make sure you have an adequate food supply!), and you can do so much more! If you bring paper, though, make sure that you have a pencil, pencil sharpener, pens, coloring supplies, and a hard surface.

Tip #5: License Plate Games

There are two games I know of that involve license plates. One is License Plate Bingo. This is where you have to try and get a bingo of the states that you see on license plates. The other is where you make funny acronyms out of three or more letters that you see on license plates. For example, three letters in a row that you might see on a license plate might be "RWM". It is your job to make up what it stands for. River-Wading Marsupial? Radioactive Washing Machines? 

Tip #6: Sleeping

It might sound lazy of me to say, but I think that sleeping is fun. I like it when the rocking of the car lulls me to sleep. It is a great way to pass the time. If you do not enjoy sleeping in the car, completely disregard this tip.

Tip #7: Play games with other passengers

Rock, Paper, Scissors can be fun. If you disagree, put your thinking cap on and make up another game to play with someone else. A fun game to play is one that I like to call the Chain Game. One player starts it out by saying a phrase, or an inside joke that everyone playing would understand. Then another player adds on to it. It's hard to explain, so I will provide an example: Live from New York, it's Saturday Night of the Living Dead Give...Away We Go...Ing on a trip in our favorite rocket ship!... When it is your turn, you have to repeat everything that came before what you are adding on to the chain. This game goes on until someone forgets the chain or someone is stumped and doesn't know what to say.

Tip #8: Use your imagination

I saved the best tip for last. Your imagination is your most powerful tool. You can imagine ANYTHING. I would say that the sky is the limit, but that would imply that there IS a limit! Create an elaborate story, then act it out in your mind. I personally like to use myself as the main character, just to get in on the action.

I understand that this was a rather long post, but you better not EVER utter the words, "Are we there yet?!" again!

Evolution of Characters

Hey, guys! I just wanted to point out that I evolve my storyeth characters! Sometimes I change their names, or change the way they look a bit. (I don't think I own a scanner, but somehow I will find a way to post how my characters look. Some of you, though, I have shown drawings of my characters. I'd be willing to bet that your favorite character drawing is of Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III!) I think that the character that I've evolved the most is Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III. For example, when I draw him, the hat that he wears is now a mini hat with a feather and he wears it on the side of his head, not the top anymore. And also, I don't know if you caught this, but in the original email I sent out of "APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY STORYETHS!!!", Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III's name was actually Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey McGee Jenkins Junior III. Believe it or not, I made his name slightly shorter, even though it is still very long. So, if you catch little things in my storyeths that just don't add up and have to do with my characters, it was either a typo, or I evolved that character.

How To Win At "Heads Up, Seven Up"

The game "Heads Up, Seven Up" can be a bit irritating, don't you think? (In case you don't know how to play, it's where everyone in a room except for seven people put their heads down and their thumbs up. The seven people who don't put their heads down push seven peoples' thumbs down. Each person only gets to push one other person's thumb down. When the people who pushed everyone else's thumbs down while their heads were down say, "Heads Up, Seven Up!" The seven people who had their thumbs pushed down have to stand up. They each take turns guessing who pushed their thumb down, but they have to choose wisely, because they only get one guess. If they guess correctly, they get to switch places with the person who chose them, so if they guess correctly, it would now be their turn to push peoples' thumbs down.) For those of you who get really frustrated at this game, which I honestly can't blame you, this post is for you!

If You Get Your Thumb Pushed Down

ONLY USE THIS TRICK IF YOU ARE IN A PARTICULARLY BAD MOOD AND WILL SNAP IF YOU LOSE THIS GAME. THIS TRICK MAY BE CONSIDERED BY SOME TO BE CHEATING. If you get your thumb pushed down, instead of scanning the seven possibilities as to who pushed down your thumb, remain seated, while everyone else who had their thumb pushed down has to stand up. Now scan your possibilities. Whoever is looking at you with a confused expression, that's probably the one who picked you. Then stand up, and when it is your turn to guess, GUESS THAT PERSON. YOU'D BE RATHER FOOLISH NOT TO. Unless, of course, they know this trick. This trick only works on people who have never heard of it, and when you are the only one performing the trick.

How To Not Be Guessed

There is no way to guarantee that whoever you chose won't guess you. That is the sad truth. But here are some tips that could help you: Don't make eye contact with anyone. If you are playing with a group that doesn't play that often and doesn't know many of the tricks, don't pick your friends. Your friends may expect you to pick them. If you are playing with a more experienced group, you should either pick your friends because they would be expecting you to pick someone else, or pick someone who you don't hang out with that much or don't know that well. Generally, if you pick someone who you don't know that well, they won't guess that you were the one to pick them, especially if one of their best friends is a possibility, but didn't pick them.

If you have any questions about this game, or comments about this post, please let me know in the comments! Please also be sure to let me know if my tricks and tips help you!

How To Officially Ruin Your Life

WARNING! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. THIS POST MAY CAUSE READERS TO BECOME ENRAGED FREQUENTLY!!!

I assume that you read the warning. Obviously, since you are reading this, you have completely ignored the warning. Smart choices, you people make. Well, here is how to officially ruin your life:

Play The Game

The Game is really simple. Here are the rules:

1. Everyone is always playing The Game, whether they know it or not.

2. If you think about The Game, you lose The Game.

3. If you lose The Game, you must say out loud, "I lost The Game."

4. Once someone loses The Game (which WILL happen), everyone around that person who heard them announce that they lost gets a 30 minute grace period to try and forget the game. This means that if they think about The Game during the half hour grace period, they do not lose. If someone who didn't hear the person announce that they lost The Game, and they lose, everyone who heard BOTH PEOPLE say that they lost gets to have their grace period time reset. So even if someone loses on the last minute of the grace period, everyone who heard gets another 30 minutes.

5. If someone has never heard of The Game, then you must explain it to them.

Make sense?(I lost The Game.)

Don't Cry Over Spilled STORYETHS!!!‏

There was once a jumpy happy-go-lucky walrus. The walrus' name was Salad. Salad lived in a basket. She loved her basket with all her heart. She played her guitar for her basket. She bought her basket gifts for its birthday. But one day, something changed. A mischievous mailbox moved in. The mailbox was their next-door neighbor. Salad went over to introduce herself to the new neighbor. "Greetings!" said the walrus to the mailbox. "Greetings," said the mailbox. "Warm regards to your basket as well!" Salad gasped in horror. "How could you?!" Unfortunately, Salad's basket heard the conversation as well and was so offended that it moved to Portugal. Salad was so sad when her basket moved away. First of all, she had just lost the love of her life. Second of all, recall that she lived in the basket, she was now homeless. But then, Salad remembered a little trick that her good friend, Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III, had taught her. This trick was only to be used in time of desperate need, and now was most certainly a time of desperate need. Salad floated all the way to Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III's house. She knocked on his door. He answered the door. When he saw Salad, he grinned. "Howdy, Salad!" said he. Then he frowned. "Salad, you seem distressed. What's the problem?" "My beloved basket moved to Portugal and I need the magical laptop!" If you, dear reader, are confused right now, you are not alone. Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III was also confused. That's why he said to Salad, "Well, why did you come to me? You know who you are supposed to consult when you're distressed!" "Oh, yeah," said Salad, who remembered who she was supposed to consult when she was distressed. Salad held her breath for twenty seconds, because that was the signal. Then Hans and Franz appeared. They said, "We want to pump--" They reverse-clapped. "--you down! Now why are you distressed?" Before Salad could answer, THE FACE, Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III's friend who lived with him came out and said, "Hey, Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III, all this commotion woke Little Simon up from his nap. Right now he's giggling. I don't know why." "Aw, crickets!" exclaimed Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III. "I didn't want him to wake up until 4:58 PM and, I checked my watch, right now it's only 4:57 PM!" Just then, an elegant cricket wearing a sports coat, top hat, a monocle, and bow tie leaped out from the grass. The cricket said, "Excuse me, but I take great offense from the phrase, 'Aw, crickets'. Would you please refrain from using that expression, at least around me or any other of my fellow crickets? Oh, dear! I've just looked at my pocket watch and found that it is now 4:59. The annual Cricket Convention begins in exactly 19 hours, 8 minutes, and 14 seconds! I may be late! If you need anything, I'm Mister Cricket. If you don't need anything, I'm Professor Cricket. It was ever-so-delightful meeting you!" Then he hopped away. Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III said, "Well, I guess I'll never say, 'Aw, crickets' again!" Then THE FACE said, "Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III, do you want me to take care of Little Simon? Should I give him a toy? Maybe a ball of yarn, or something?" "Yes. Thanks, THE FACE. You always have my back!" replied Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III cheerfully. THE FACE left to go give Little Simon a ball of yarn. Salad said, "Hans and Franz, I apologize for making you wait so long." "We accept your apology, Salad," said Hans and Franz robotically. "And thank you for waiting so patiently," said Salad. "You're welcome, Salad," responded Hans and Franz. "You see," began Salad. "What I am distressed about is the fact that my beloved basket moved away. It moved to Portugal. I need the magical laptop to get it back. Without it, I don't have a home, or anything to love." "Well, you can always love me!" said Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III. He grinned, and Salad could see all three of his green teeth. "I will always love you as my best friend, Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III. But I need my basket back, because I will always love it as my home," said Salad. "Alright. We will go on an epic quest to get your magical laptop!" Hans and Franz went out to find the magical laptop. They took the vorpal blade and slayed the Jabberwocky. Then a troll who was watching from behind a tree came up to Hans and Franz and talked to them. He said, "I see you are seeking the magical laptop. Allow me to help you out. I will give you the magical laptop. But! I will only give it to you if you can solve my riddle!" "Okay," said Hans and Franz. "Tell us your riddle." The troll grew an extra arm. Then he said, "'I love air so much I breathe it every single day. I love the Earth so much I live on it.' I will give you five minutes to solve my riddle. If you cannot solve it within the provided time, no magical laptop for you! Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!" "That's easy!" exclaimed Hans and Franz. "The answer is One Direction!" "Dagnabbit!" Exclaimed the troll. He handed the magical laptop to Hans and Franz. Then he said, "Gee, everyone always gets the answer to my riddles right away! Maybe I should come up with some new riddles!" Then the troll disappeared. Hans and Franz returned the magical laptop to Salad. Salad was overjoyed. "Oh, thank you, thank you thank you!!! I can't believe it! You gave me my magical laptop!" Salad immediately typed in "Control+z", and then the whole day was deleted. She was back with her basket. This time, when the mailbox tried to move in next-door, Salad didn't let it. And Salad, her basket, Uncle Billy Bobby Joseph Joey Jenkins Junior III, THE FACE, Little Simon, Hans, Franz, and even the troll and the mailbox lived happily ever after.

Then Bob ate a pie. You know. 'Cause Bob eats pie.